Five Tips for Creating Social Events with Your Shy Teen
by Kathleen A. Matchunis, B.A., M.S., Certified Professional Coach
It is very common that parents notice that their teen doesn’t have much of a social life but they don’t always know what to do about it. This lack of a social life is something I see quite often as a social skills and life coach for teens. Many times, a teen may be raised in a family where social events are limited or the parents may be introverts. Sometimes, the parents have an active social life but their teen’s natural tendency is to be more shy and reserved.
In any case, being able to make social connections is essential for happiness in one’s personal life and success in the workplace. You may not know how to approach this lack of connection that your teen is experiencing but it is important to help your teen learn how to become socially adept.
Here are five simple tips to assisting your teen with planning a social event.
- Be a good role-model. Teens can’t learn how to be social from just talking about it. If you do not feel comfortable giving a large party, you might want to have one family or just a few friends over to your home or meet at a restaurant.
- Plan a social event with your teen. Choose a theme. It can be a holiday party, a video party, a movie night, a make your own pizza party. Make a guest list which is not too overwhelming for a first time host.
- If your teen has never hosted friends before, review with them what they need to do such as greeting friends, planning food and drinks, organizing an activity, knowing what to do if someone spills something, and handling after party clean up, etc. Review respecting house rules.
- Be open to meeting your teen’s friends. Try to approachable and non-judgmental. Teens, by nature are often insecure and attempting to discover their identity by trying different looks. So, just be friendly and treat them as people.
- Do not hover. When your teen invites someone over, do not lurk around. Just greet them, supply some food and beverages, and retreat. Appear occasionally under the auspices of checking on the food supply and ask everyone if they are doing all right.
Having teens over to your home gives you insight into your teen and his/her friends. You will learn more than you ever thought possible. If you are on a budget, have everyone bring a different dish or just provide snacks and drinks, rather than a meal. If you do not feel comfortable having kids over to your house, you can help your teen organize a get-together at the movie theatre, laser tag center, or some other event. Make sure that other parents know that you will be supervising, if you are dealing with younger teens.
Guiding your teen with social events will be one of the best investments of time which you will ever make. In today’s business world, it is not only what you know but who you know. The truth is you can’t just know people, you have to know how to connect with them to form personal and business relationships.
Original content by Kathleen Matchunis, B.A., M.S., CPC. Call for a complimentary session with experienced educator, social skills and academic coach, Kathy Matchunis. Tel. 954- 294 -9708 Website: www.connectinginc.net and check us out on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/ConnectingInc/
