Winning?
By Kathleen A. Matchunis, President of Connecting, Inc.
Are you winning at life? In order to determine this, what are your criteria? Is it how much you make? Is it how many friends you have or the quality of those friendships? Is it your job title or the satisfaction you find in your work?
My point is that you get to choose the criteria. If you are trying to win at life, according to other people’s criteria, you will not be able to truly win. So, how do you choose your criteria? You have to think about what parts of life bring you true, lasting satisfaction as opposed to momentary happiness or fleeting glory.
You have to live your life for yourself or it will be really disappointing when you do an inventory at the end of your life and find that you have lived your life according to other people’s criteria. It is matter of knowing yourself and staying true to your values, although the prevailing culture may be counter to what you value.
You can feel like a success when you set goals to accomplish which you feel important, rather than what other people value. Do you feel pressured into buying a certain brand car or clothing because you don’t have a true sense of who you are? If people like you because of your luxury car or brand-name clothing, are these people really friends and are they really important in your life?
When you free yourself of other people’s criteria, you free those around you to be their authentic selves. What relief I see on people’s faces when I proudly tell them that I love my old, reliable car and enjoy not having a car payment or that I buy my sunglasses at the flea market.
As Marianne Williams has stated, ” And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others”.
So, allow your light to shine without worrying about the judgment of others. The good news is that you don’t need tiger blood to feel that you are “winning”.
Take some time to find out what your priorities really are and live your life according to those priorities. Congratulations – you are a winner, living life on your own terms!